Have you ever reached your limit? Like you just can’t take any more or you are just going to scream? I feel like we have all been there. We feel like we are on the verge of just completely losing it on someone. I know I have.
Often, we go through life this way. We are stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And when it does, we break down, lose our shit, and don’t know what to do.
This is especially true if you have children. If you’re a mother or a parent, I’m sure you’ve been there, where you’ve been taken to your limits (and if you desire a manual be sure to read our top 4 tips right here). When this happened to me when my kids were younger, I promised myself no more monster mommy moments. I don’t know if you’ve ever had a monster mommy moment, but I had those moments where I would just lose myself on my babies. And it made me so ashamed of myself. I would ask myself, what is my problem? I was never an angry person. I was never this person. Like I was pretty unemotional, to be quite honest. But our children can be our greatest teachers, and often our biggest triggers. My kids have taken me to my limit so many times. I have yelled and screamed and said the most horrible things. I didn’t know who I was anymore. I would ask myself things like, “what is wrong with me?” I felt so much shame every time I lost it on my kids. I promised myself no more. I wanted to find a way to handle my emotions in a different way. Spoiler Alert! There is an immense amount of truth behind those triggers that you can use to heal, fast.
And then it happened again. I tried everything I’d been taught to do. I tried to breathe through it and think positive. I had learned EFT, which is a form of tapping you might have heard about, that helps neutralize the emotion. So I decided to try that. I took myself to the bathroom and started tapping away. I was using it to try and calm myself down as it’s traditionally taught. I wanted to calm my emotions.
So, before I became the monster mommy again, I did the best thing I knew to do and I locked myself in the bathroom. I began trying to diffuse the emotion using the tools I’d learned. I started tapping in the traditional way and saying things like, “I’m feeling so angry. I feel this anger all over my body. So much anger, so much anger, releasing this anger. I don’t need to be angry. Feeling the joy. Letting go of this anger. Letting go of his anger.”
And then I snapped y’all. Something crazy happened. I looked at myself in the mirror and I started tapping while saying the worst, most terrible, no good, very bad things that have ever come out of my body. I said them about myself. I said them about my children. I said how much I hated myself, how disgusting I was. I looked at myself in the mirror and said, “You’re so disgusting. You’re such a terrible person. You’re a terrible mother.” And then I said stuff about my kids. Things like, “I hate these kids. I hate being a mom, I hate all of this.” Basically, I lost my shit and discovered the Rapid Relief Technique™!
You know what, guys? The things I was saying weren’t necessarily true. But in that moment, they felt very true. It’s incredible how once you’ve moved through the emotion, it’s like a veil is lifted. And you realize the things you were feeling and saying weren’t true at all. But in the middle of the emotion, you couldn’t see anything differently.
Many of us are living with all these emotions stuffed down inside so we literally can’t see anything differently. Because we have to process these emotions first. It can feel kind of weird and scary to do it because sometimes the craziest things will come out. But what is interesting is that when you really get into it and let the emotions flow, it only lasts a moment. When I was in that bathroom saying all of the horrible things and tapping, it moved through so quickly and then all of a sudden, I just felt this release. I felt lighter. All of a sudden, I didn’t have to force myself to feel better or to breathe deeper. It was just gone. I walked out of the bathroom and it was like the whole room had changed. The kids had changed. Everything had changed. I thought it was weird at first, but then I started doing it more and more. I started paying attention to the things that triggered me. And more than that, I started paying attention to the small things, not just the big things. Often, we let things build up until we snap. But when I started paying attention to the tiny little things that were bothering me, and used those moments where I just felt off, and took the time to tap, everything changed.
This is the Rapid Relief Technique ™ in action. We learn to use the things happening in our life to clear our emotions so we get relief from stress, anxiety, and overwhelm. So we don’t lose our shit anymore. At least not on others. This is the key to really creating something different for ourselves so we start feeling better. Let’s dive in a bit further and learn about how this actually works.
Most of you may have heard of EFT. EFT is a tapping technique that is used to disseminate, lower, or decrease an emotion. So, if you are in the middle of a big emotion, you might use EFT to try and neutralize it. The Rapid Relief Technique™ utilizes tapping but in a very different way. If you are familiar with EFT or another version of tapping, please pay attention because the Rapid Relief Technique™ uses tapping very differently.
Whereas EFT seeks to neutralize the emotion, RRT is used to amplify the emotions. Bear with me. With RRT we really go down into it and pull out every little piece of it to get to the core emotions. If we’re neutralizing the emotions, they just keep showing up. And that’s what we see, right? We can learn to react differently. We can learn to neutralize. We can learn to diffuse. But ultimately, those emotions are just going to keep showing up. They’ll just keep showing up and that’s annoying. Who wants that? We want to learn how to eliminate, and that’s exactly what we do.
If you go google tapping, you will find a whole bunch of information, a lot of it we don’t teach. We use some of the same tapping points, but we don’t use all of them. We’ve found that a lot of that information is not very helpful in understanding our emotions, fully processing them, and changing our genetic setpoints, which is what we want to do. In fact, we actually find it moves things in the opposite direction. It actually continues to reestablish these setpoints and not create true change. We are using the Rapid Relief Technique™ because we want lasting change.
I dive into the full method and the exact way we tap in the Rapid Relief Technique Accelerator Course, if you want to learn more and see it in action. But I’ll also give you some examples below of how you can start using this in your own life.
What do you do in these situations where you have big emotions coming up? The first thing is you need to remember that emotions are not rational or logical. You may wake up angry. You might have no idea why you feel angry, you just do. Instead of trying to breathe through it, think positive, feel gratitude, etc. in that moment you would let the emotions come. You would sit with them and go deeper. You would feel the anger and tap as you say all the things you really want to say, for example, “I just want to rip somebody’s head off right now. I want to punch a wall. I hate this stupid life.” A lot of times, you’ll start saying things that to your brain almost don’t feel true. “I hate this life. I don’t want to be here. So stupid. This world is just so stupid.”
Your brain wants to think, oh, I shouldn’t be saying these things. But they’re coming out of your body. Because it’s there. It lives in you. It doesn’t make sense. And that’s okay. It doesn’t need to make sense. Don’t judge it. When we judge it, we compound the emotion. We add another layer of emotion to clear. Instead, we just need to say, “well, I feel like I might want to kill somebody right now. And I don’t know why. And I really wish I didn’t, but I do. So I need to go deal with that.” Often we start thinking, oh my God, I’m a bad person. I have these bad thoughts. No. Thoughts and emotions aren’t bad. They just are. Now if we go and act on those, that’s a different story. Humans aren’t for hurting. But thoughts, emotions, feelings, all of these things, nothing about them are bad, they just are. But they’re here to be understood, explored, and processed. That’s where the learning occurs. That’s where the evolution occurs. That’s where the change occurs in the processing and understanding of our emotions. This is how our human works. The reason so many of us in our world feel so stuck and so clogged, is because we aren’t evolving, because we aren’t feeling.
You evolve through emoting. When you process your emotions, you actually begin to understand, learn, and grow from the situation, then you can actually change your setpoint and see the world differently, you evolve. So we’re all over here trying to evolve, trying to be better trying to do this trying to do this, and we’re missing the key component to this. Now, the Rapid Relief Technique™ makes it happen a lot faster, and makes it a lot easier. Because if we’re just standing here saying, Oh, I gotta feel something, well, I don’t know, what do I feel we’re so out of touch with our emotions, it’s hard.
So we use life. We start paying attention to the little things. We start paying attention to our judgments and criticisms. Our judgments are like the windows to our souls. They show us where we’ve denied ourselves. They show us the parts of us we hate. We all want to get to self-love. Self-love isn’t about getting a pedicure and giving yourself a hug. Don’t get me wrong, those things are great. But self-love is actually about looking at all the pieces and parts of us that we have hated, denied, shamed and judged, processing the emotions around those and embracing them and loving them. That’s self-love. That’s how you become a fully developed human being.
We use the tiniest things. A spilled glass of water… Someone who cut you off in traffic… And what’s interesting is that so much of it leads to deeper stuff. We start tapping on a spilled glass of water saying things like, “I’m so mad at this stupid water. I’m so mad about the stupid water.” And then all of a sudden, we start saying, “I can never do anything, right. I can never do anything right.” All of these memories of messing things up and being in trouble for it start to come up. All the times we’ve felt shame or judged ourselves for messing up.
As you go through all these emotions, all of these things bring up emotions from the past that you may not even remember. And as you continue using the little things, you clear more and more, and you slowly but surely get rid of those rocks that were hanging on your setpoints. You start to feel more safe, more free, more loved, and happier. You start noticing that everything is getting better. It really isn’t hard. You use the things that are driving you nuts in life and you tap.
This can apply to parenting, relationships, work, money, your body…all the things. All of a sudden, you don’t need to find external motivation. You’re just motivated. All of a sudden, you’re not looking for validation in love, and to be seen and heard from the outside world. You feel that way inside. You become an unstoppable, superhuman, and it feels great. You’ve released all of this trauma, all of these emotions that have just been living in you making you tired and cranky and frustrated and stressed. They are just gone.
Pay attention to your world. Pay attention to those little things you’re tolerating. Those little things that are actually bothering you. Give yourself a timeout. Tap on it. Start getting it all out of your body. And then after we do that, then we want to anchor into what we want to know.
So I want you to go and try this, give it a go. Find something that’s bothering you, go use it and see how it works. This isn’t a one and done kind of thing you guys, this is a lifestyle. You have to start using all those things that are triggering you so you can clear the emotions that come up. It’s time to start looking at all of this.
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